Dear friends,
Can I tell you how crazy it has been around our house and at the hospital these days? I am wearing out my little paws trying to keep everyone in line in both places. Let me tell you about the nonsense at home first - you just won't believe what has been happening. Now, let me start by saying that I know that veterinarians are supposed to be sorta smart people. But bless my whiskers, you would never know it from the one I live with. And I think you DO have to remember that just like Doctors and Lawyers and Presidents, half of all veterinarians graduated in the lower 50% of their class and I hope you see where I am going with this with respect to the presidential primaries. And I'll say no more.....
Now, where was I??? Oh! NO, I was not saying that any of our Doctors, most especially my Mom, graduated in the lower half of their class - in fact, all of our Doctors graduated at the top of their classes. But Mom acts like she didn't, sometimes. And I'm also saying that we can't forget that some presidential candidates (and some Presidents, from what I hear) did not graduate in that upper 50%, either. And Mom says I absolutely, positively, have to stop now and get back "on track." OK, so long as it is a democratic train........
Let me try to focus - it's hard with Mom always interrupting me. Oh, yes! I wanted to tell you that she brought us another dog. Now. Let’s be serious for a minute. Let's pretend that you have a life partner. And one day, you come home, and your partner has someone else sitting there on the couch with her. "Honey," she says - "look who is going to live with us from now on!" And the new person is cuter than you. Honestly, what would you think? Is this a BAD idea, or is it a REALLY bad idea? Well, that's what I think, too.
But that's what Mom did. With a dog, I mean. She brought us a five and a half year old Bullmastiff. I was so shocked that my whiskers almost fell out! OK, OK, yeah, he needed a home.....and OK, OK, he IS really nice and he's very humble and he lets me be the boss. But there is one bad thing. Do you remember my column from last year where I told you about my invention for dogs with bad gas? The Glade type plug-in that could be plugged into - well, never mind, Mom said that I can't say that word. Well, this dog needs one, desperately. Mom says he's just new and a little nervous. I say that no one better strike a match until he calms down. Mom says that wasn't very nice to say. I sure hope he calms down fast, is all I can say.....
And that's not the worst part. He comes to work with us, too, and apparently THAT makes him nervous also. I'm glad that he's so big that he gets the big dog kennel away from me and Hebert. That way, I can focus better on what I need to do at the hospital. We are looking at lots of paint chips and tile squares and floor samples and baseboard colors because as soon as we can afford it we are going to spruce up the clinic a little. I like the brown colors for the tile - Mom hasn't made up her mind - she says she can't tell from such teeny little squares so she is going to let the staff decide. She's not good with paint colors, either - maybe you could come in and help her - but most of the staff like the greens and caramels we are thinking of using for paint colors. We painted some samples on the wall of a room so you can see them too, if you want to. I think Mom needs color help....
I asked around, but they don't seem to teach anything about that in vet school or at those seminars she is always going to. So, my friends, unless you come in and ask to look at these samples and help us out, we might have a pretty icky looking hospital here. And I will have to BE there every day, so I really, really am asking for your help here. And if you do come in, please don't forget that there is a box of biscuits in each room for smart and good dogs like me, OK?
Your friend,
LIZZIE