DEAR FRIENDS:

I am so excited!  My Mom told me that she had a big surprise for me last week. I immediately came running as fast as I could to see what the surprise was (I was hoping for some food, actually) but she held me up to the computer and guess what? Some of you actually wrote to me!  Not to my Mom, or to our Webmistress Kelly, but to ME.  So this month, I am going to answer your letters.  I feel like such a celebrity!  Maybe.... someone like Miss Manners.  No, maybe not her - I'm not that polite. 

I hope I can calm down to write good answers to your questions.  I haven't been this excited since the Bears almost won.  But I took their loss in stride, because I am also a Cubs fan.  So I know that disappointment is not fatal, and I know that there will always be another chance next year.  And speaking of the Cubs, what were those supposed baseball gurus thinking, to not elect our Ron into the Baseball Hall of Fame?  I tell you what, Ron Santo is definitely in the Knollwood Hall of Fame.  My Mom even has a big autographed picture of Ron in her office.  And she wears her "This Old Cub" sweatshirt every day when she exercises.  We love you at Knollwood, Ron!

OK, here's question number one:

"Dear Lizzie, I know that, being a Terrier, you have a short attention span - but a long while ago you promised to show us a picture of your cat, and I've been waiting, and so has MY cat.  We both want to see what Emmett looks like. 

Is he really as ugly as you say?"

Well.  I guess how Emmett looks is in the eye of the beholder.  Let's just say that he had a very bad life before my Mom adopted him from PACT, and maybe his past bad life is responsible for the way he looks.  I mean, that's why all the members of The Rolling Stones look the way they look, right?  Speaking of which, someone needs to tell 'ol Mick NOT to wear those short-sleeved T-shirts during concerts.  All I'm gonna say is, I bet he'd get more satisfaction if he covered up those flappy upper arms.....eeew! 

Anyway, I must focus, now that I am a celebrity writer.  Here Emmett is, sitting in the fruit bowl on our kitchen table.  He likes to hook out all the fruit and then climb right in.  When Gramma Mitchell comes to visit, we have to make very sure to remember to put the fruit bowl away, because Gramma doesn't think it is sanitary for cats to be on the table.  I can't imagine why she feels that way - I have been up there myself, and it looks perfectly clean and sanitary to me!

Question number two:

"Dear Lizzie, I have a dog with a limp and my vet says that he needs to have cruciate surgery.  But I read about your cruciate surgery and it sounds like you had a really tough time.  I don't want my dog to go through that.  Can you suggest something else?"

I can't lie - I HATED having that surgery and I hated the recovery even more!  Here is the straight scoop, though, and you know that your Lizzie wouldn't lie to you: if your sweet poochie-dog really has a bad cruciate injury, surgery is the best way to have a strong, healthy leg that will not have bad arthritis later on.  So I think you may want to reconsider the surgery.  I will tell you the truth; I was not very comfortable for about 4 weeks.  But my Mom made sure that I had medication to make me feel good, and she did acupuncture and chiropractic on me too, and I also did a lot of therapeutic swimming so my leg would get strong fast.  And now, I can run and play for hours and I can even jump up on the kitchen table and eat the cat's food.  So I guess I grudgingly have to say I am glad I had the surgery.  I think your dog will be glad, too. 

Now remember, sweetums:  the surgery isn't the end of things - you will still need to make sure that your dog stays nice and slim and that she takes a good joint support, like Cosequin, or Arthriease, or Dasuquin, every single day.

Question number three:

This one was not really a question to me, but it came into our website and the lady who wrote mentioned that she had read my column and was going to use my advice, so I am going to be nosy and answer her:  She told us that her cat has had diarrhea for a long time and there is blood in it.  Her vet said that she needs to have endoscopy done, and some biopsies too, to find out what the problem is.  But she says that costs a lot of money.  So she thinks she will just try the probiotics like I mentioned in one of my columns a while ago.

I know she didn't ask me, but I gotta say this worries me a little, because of the blood.  I am going to think good thoughts to her cat because I know that this will help, but I have to say that I don't think that probiotics alone (or even my thoughts, as powerful as they are) will fix the problem.  Here's something I want you all to think about: I bet that most of us, if we saw a bloody sore that didn't heal on our skin, we would be scared and would want to fix it right away, because we know that something that bleeds and doesn't heal is maybe a bad thing.  But sometimes when the same thing is going on, on the inside, we don't treat it as seriously - and we ought to, buckaroos!  I hope this lady will go back to her vet, explain her cost concerns, and see if maybe there is another way her vet could figure out what the problem is.  It sounds like a BIG problem to me!

Annnnnnd, last but not least:

"Dear Lizzie, what is the deal with this hazardous waste fee I saw on my bill the last time I brought my pet to your hospital?  What the heck was hazardous about getting a heartworm test, a toenail trim, an ear cleaning, and those NASTY anal glands taken care of?"

Dear friend, we could not agree more that anal glands are nasty.  Whoever invented them must have had a warped sense of humor, or must have run out of good ideas, or had just finished inventing mosquitoes and wanted to try something even more annoying next.  Here's what I do when a dog comes into the clinic to have his anal glands treated: I run as quick as I can to the other side of the clinic and bury my nose in my paws till our Nurses are done.  That's how bad anal glands smell!  Now, years ago, my Mom says that vet hospitals used to just empty out those glands, and do surgeries, and even draw blood, and just throw their used stuff into the trash.  Now there are laws to prevent this, because if this stuff is found in the trash, who is to know that it came from an animal?  And if you think that pets carry diseases, just get a load of the creepy cruddy diseases your own species is carrying, buddy!  So now, anything that comes from an animal is considered "hazardous waste", and we have to save it in a special big red container in a special spot in the clinic, and it is picked up to be incinerated in a special Hazardous Waste Treatment Facility.  And you wouldn't believe what that costs.  But we did figure out how much stuff we can pack into one of those containers and divided that cost out per item per contributing pet.  That's the hazardous waste fee.  So, starting this year, anything that your pet produces, or that is collected, is assessed that fee.  It seemed fairer to us than just raising the cost on everything, and we hope you agree!

Well, dear ones, this was a lot of fun, even though I am not used to thinking so hard for such a long period of time.  I hope you write to me again soon. 

I have some more undignified pictures of my other cats and dogs to share, if anyone else wants to see them.  And of course, you know you'll always get good sound advice from your straight-shootin' friend, Lizzie!